(no subject)

[christopher575]

I've mentioned that I don't care for cars. I often think about a stupid car situation I found myself in, and it makes me glad that it's highly unlikely that it'll ever happen again.

Let me just start by saying that I don't like asking people for help. I'll search all around a grocery store before asking an employee where to find something. People who ask questions about the bus instead of looking at the schedule right next to them really bother me. fuckinggoogleit.com is one of my favorite sites.

Anyway, I was pulling up to my parents' house in one of the stupid cars I used to have. Probably the 1986 Ford Escort. The one that needed $600 in repairs in order to get a trade-in value of $600. I pushed the seatbelt button and it didn't work. I pushed it again. Nothing. Push push push push push push push push. Nothing.

I was trapped in my car. This was many years before I had a cell phone, and several hours before anyone was supposed to be home. What the hell was I supposed to do? Drive around and ask people for help? "Excuse me, my seatbelt is jammed and I can't get out. Do you have, I don't know, some scissors? A nail file? Where are you going?" Imagine my horror. Even the idea of driving to a friend's house was awful, because I hate people who drive up and honk the horn.

My mom always said it was nearly impossible to keep me in a carrier because I could wiggle my way out of the straps. My fear of talking to strangers and asking for help made this long-forgotten skill bubble back to the surface, and I managed to wiggle my way out of the seatbelt without unbuckling it.

Stupid cars.

Comments

[pixiespage.livejournal.com]

wow, you have skill.

i think how you feel about cars is how i feel about horses

[leolz.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I used to drive in a bucket like that so I bought one of those tools that has a hammer for smashing your window out so you dont drown, a razor for cutting seatbelts, a compartment for matches, and a flashlight.

[deadflowers.livejournal.com]

i rarely laugh aloud at the internet, but this post forced me to.

how was the situation resolved?

[christopher575.livejournal.com]

The Houdini escape skills from my infancy allowed me to shimmy back and forth and I got out.

[popicn.livejournal.com]

That's crazy! Can you imagine if it was some like final destination thing going on?

[badrobot68.livejournal.com]

The car runs out of gas on the train tracks!
Clearly, the car had plans for 575.

[filarabit.livejournal.com]

That was the slowest car ever made!