christopher575

Yesterday I followed the Lifetime Unauthorized Melrose Place Story with the Lifetime Unauthorized Beverly Hills, 90210 story, not realizing yesterday was the 30th anniversary of 90210's first episode. I also didn't realize that I'd end up dreaming about the Melrose Place one, but in my version, they double-casted every role and eliminated one of everyone based on performance in rehearsals right up until time to shoot the first scenes. That's funny because if you've watched season 1 of Melrose Place, you can tell they didn't rehearse, and the Unauthorized Melrose Place Story confirms that.

These are fun and should be watched in the opposite order because that's the order the shows were made in. Some of the casting is the same in both movies but oddly, one woman plays a different agent in each and her role in the Melrose Place one didn't make it onto the IMDb entry.

And the casting of Abbie Cobb as Jennie Garth is the most brilliant biopic casting I've ever seen. She looks so much like her I could barely believe it.

I recently had a dream where I was browsing in a store and suddenly couldn’t find an item I’d just seen a minute earlier, and there was tons of it before. Some sort of yellow paint tubes with an attached brush or something. I asked the sales associate where it all went and she said they ran out of it a few days earlier. I said no, I just saw a whole bunch of it right here.

“That area was fully stocked when you were here three weeks ago, but we sold it all.”

Realizing I’d lost three weeks worth of memories was absolutely terrifying anyway, but my heart started pounding when she asked, “Don’t you remember? that was a crazy day. Hold on, I have some saved Instagram stories.”

Thankfully I woke up in a panic right then but the feeling of dread lasted for hours.

My dream this morning was a horror movie starring notlostonme. She was trapped with a group of friends in a huge mansion that also had a bowling alley, and had until dawn to bowl a 300, taking shots while the killer stepped away from the lanes to hunt down the others. Between strikes, she had to hide from the killer because she was a target as well. I woke up just after it was apparent she finished the game and bowling balls started crashing in through doorways and staircases to distract him, and she was about to emerge and crack his skull open with the ball she bowled a perfect game with.

Here's a time lapse of the sun in yesterday afternoon's smoke. Today I'm probably only leaving the house to go to the grocery store.

Sometimes I wonder if working from home is bad for immunity. I'm rarely in any sort of crowd. Even regular crowded places like grocery stores, I try to hit in the morning when they're empty.

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Last night for the first time in ages, the sounds around me crept into my dream. My boxer briefs were made of sheet metal, and when I bumped into one of the front porch walls at my grandparents' house, they made a rattling noise that wouldn't stop. I finally woke up and realized it was the sound of my CPAP. That got me thinking about it a lot, and I realized it was finally time to address my water bottle situation.

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I didn't sleep very well between 2:00 and when my alarm went off at 4:00, so I went back to bed for a bit. The 40 minutes that passed between then and when I finally got out of bed seem like a lot more. I dreamed that Garrett and I were eating breakfast, and I thought I could see neighbors across the way in their kitchen, but it turned out to be people gathering in our living room, and the house turned out to be the last one I lived in before leaving Albuquerque.

About 20 people started pouring in, and it turned out to be a flash mob housekeeping service someone had arranged for us. I was somewhat grateful because the house was a mess, but the people were really annoying. There was an old-timey theme to it all. They quickly hung up period art, wore costumes, and all talked over each other to try to be funny and make us feel important. I yelled at them and went to take some trash to the alley.

I think I jumped back in time because they were gone and it was night, and the house was still a mess. Sam and Steve were there, as well as a Maine coon who'd just had a litter of kittens. I asked if we had to update our vacation cat sitting plans because of them, or if the the mom cat would just take care of the kittens herself. A legitimate question. Steve was making a very big mess of all my oldest possessions, like the jewelry I used to wear in high school. And Garrett was briefly replaced by my oldest friend Chad.

In the back yard again, I tried to post something with my phone, but when I pulled it out, it was a small blue square, and that's when I realized I was dreaming. The whole thing had been pretty tedious, so I decided to wake up. I'm not sure if I actually did, or just dreamed that I woke up for a bit, but when I tried to turn over off my stomach, I found myself in a dream again. Realizing I was lucid, I figured I'd walk around a bit and see what I could see.

I left via a hotel lobby in San Francisco, and the streetscape was quite realistic. One thing I noticed that was off was that the raindrops hitting the sidewalk flowed uphill. Across the street, I walked past a Thai restaurant and was amazed by the level of detail my brain created in the mural on the side, which was full of writing I have no way of reading, writing, or even faking if I drew it in real life, and it didn't shift or anything when I studied it as I passed. Behind that was an even bigger wall painted green and covered in really cool faces painted in various shades of black, green, and yellow.

I repeated the cycle of either waking up or thinking I did, then rolling out of bed and into the hotel lobby a few more times, but I can't remember anything else I saw. I know all of this happened because I was laying on my stomach in frustration after tossing from one side to the other for those two hours, because I could see the imagery in front of me becoming the sensations of the pillow pressed against my face as I woke up. There was an article a while back which said you're more likely to have erotic dreams if you sleep on your stomach, but I'd take that a step further and say you're more likely to have detailed dreams, and if they turn erotic, that's just the option you went with.

I had a very Inception sort of night. I always wake up many times during the night because I can only sleep on my sides, and I get sore and have to flip. Plus I snore. Yadda yadda. But last night I had the kind of night where I kept going back into the same dream, plus in the dream, I'd also wake up over and over, and I'd been dreaming the dream within a dream for about a month.

The cool part was that in the dream, I was watching Mad Men, and instead of ending at the end of this season, it kept going, but with new characters outside the advertising world. And they were all played by musicians. I can't really remember who all I saw, but I know for sure that PJ Harvey looks really great in 1970 business drag.

This morning I dreamed that Lindy West and I were helping test a new transportation service for stressed-out people. They fed us pot cookies and laid us on a flatbed truck and drove us around. I actually was quite stoned in the dream. The only thing I remember saying was, "If I ever become a concert, I'm definitely hiring these guys." We laughed and laughed.

I heard a few bars of my alarm tone, but it was really faint, and it stopped on its own, so I figured I dreamed it. It was already a strange night because earlier, I got up to pee and saw it was 3:30. Normally that would be probably my third time getting up to pee, and it's really weird for me to sleep for that long without getting up. Anyway, I figured when I woke up again it was probably 3:45 or so and that my alarm would be coming along shortly. I even had a mini-dream where I looked at my phone and it was 4:20.

I can't remember if my main dream happened before all this or in the middle of it, but in it, I was an actor starring in a biopic. It was about an assassin who was hired by the government to tour with The Beatles, who were reunited with a John Lennon impersonator. The assassin looked like the impersonator, and would carry out missions during those Beatles shows.

Of course, now that I think about it, it would be smarter to have the assassin just be a roadie. Anyway.

I was playing that assassin in the biopic, and I was dating the actor Alec Mapa. He was visiting me on location.
And he could fly. We were flying around kinda like Superman and Lois Lane and just talking about stuff, and I was really impressed with him because he wasn't smug, even though he could fly.

Back in reality, I was laying around, drifting in and out of sleep, and was really amazed by how long my expanded perception of time kept going. I really thought I was laying in bed between 3:45 and 4:10, but then the hallway light came on and Garrett was feeding the cats, and I caught a glimpse of the clock. I could see the minute hand pointing down, which meant it was at least 4:30. Curious. So I got up to grab my phone, and found that it wasn't even in its spot. I left it out by the couch all night, and probably actually heard it at 4:10 when I thought I was dreaming it. It was actually more like 5:35 and I was able to get here about half an hour later by skipping my walk.

One of the things I dream about all the time is real estate. I'm always having dreams about really weird places to live, like strange buildings on hills with switchback hallways, rows of apartments with glass living rooms on the ends, and penthouses with impossible views.

This morning, it was about my grandparents' house. In real life, it was a really cool house. It was built on a giant plot of land in a really peaceful neighborhood, and it started as a two-room house and eventually became a giant 3-bedroom. Amazing brick living room looking out onto a giant, screened-in porch. Master bedroom with an entire wall of closet with floor-to-ceiling mirror sliding doors. Nothing particularly ostentatious, just big and well-done. My mom's stepdad eventually even added a huge workshop and a freestanding garage big enough for a Winnebago.

In the dream this morning, everyone was still alive, and we were there checking the place out as somewhere to possibly take over and move into. The garage had become a miniature warehouse, and there was an apartment-sized master suite upstairs in one corner. I was pretty excited about it, but suddenly I realized the concrete wasn't dry and everyone had messed it up. We started to smooth it back out, when a huge row of cabinetry came crashing down, destroying two cars.

I almost never realize I'm dreaming, no matter how ridiculous the situation becomes. When it does happen, I really enjoy the experience of lucid dreaming, but it's rare. I should have realized it immediately when my mom's stepdad told me he loved me in the dream, because that definitely never would have happened in real life.