christopher575

On my last flight, when I ordered my screwdriver, the cool flight attendant signaled to her partner that she needed a vodka by holding her fingers up to her mouth in the shape of a "V". I shit you not. So now I'm enjoying a cunnilingus with cran-apple juice because I'm a bit orangejuiced out. The cranberry juice will also help with the bladder infection I'm sure to get from sitting here needing to pee. I didn't need to when it was time to board, but the moment my foot hit the jetway I of course needed to.

Two of the attendants this flight look enough like old co-workers that they could play them in a movie about me. Strangely enough, they're the two I'd most care to keep in touch with.